How Boomer Parents Fail At Financial Parenting

I flunked nighttime parenting. 

My kids couldn’t go to sleep by themselves for so long I worried they wouldn’t be able to go away to college. I needn’t have worried. After a few years, they no longer needed a sleep doula. I still read a story every night, but I could turn off the lights without drama. No lasting damage done.

But failing at financial parenting has a long-term cost.

So many of us helicopter-parent boomers get an F in financial parenting. We find it hard to teach our kids to become financially independent. By that, I don’t just mean supporting them financially. 

I meet so many young adults whose parents do their taxes for them, control their investments, and keep them in the dark about their inheritances. Even if young adults support themselves, they are being infantilized by not being taught how to manage their money. It fosters dependency and ignorance, which isn’t healthy for them or their parents.

If you’re an adult, you need to understand your tax return and plan for the tax implications of life changes and financial decisions. If your taxes are complex, understand how conservative or aggressive your accountants are. If too conservative, you may be leaving money on the table. If too aggressive, you’ll be the one paying fines or going to jail. 

If your return is simple, pay for tax prep or DIY. Your signature on the tax return means you’re the responsible party. Keep mom and dad out of it.

Photo credit: The Miriam and Ira D. Wallach Division of Art, Prints and Photographs: Picture Collection, The New York Public Library. "Children counting money."